I wanted to take a minute to talk about the little hurts in your relationship today because little hurts building up over time can destroy your most vital and loving intentions.
- Maybe your partner says something that hurts your feelings and you shrug it off and “let it go” for the sake of diplomacy. You don’t want a confrontation, so you bury this little hurt today.
- Maybe you go along with something that makes you feel uncomfortable for the sake of making your partner happy, but your contribution seems to be taken for granted – goes unappreciated – but you bury this little hurt today.
- Maybe you’re tired of being nagged about something that’s not a priority right now and wonder what’s the point of even trying, but you bury this little hurt today.
- Maybe you have mustered up the courage to tell your partner how you really feel about something that’s important to you, only to have it shot down, criticized, or ignored, but you bury this little hurt today.
Every single day, men and women choose to bury some little hurt because they love their partners and want to make their relationship work…
For the kids.
Because they cannot bear the thought of breakup.
Meanwhile, these little hurts are feeding self-preservational instincts below the surface, and building up to a downward spiral that can to destroy the love you have…
It does NOT have to be this way!
I have always said that you can be the most loving, compassionate, and spiritual person in the world and still get tripped up in your relationship because our instinctual nature, hidden in the unconscious mind, gets in the way of our conscious intentions whether we are aware of them or not.
When we know how instinct works, we can navigate it: we can trip, stumble a little, and recover quickly. But when instinct operates under the radar, the results can be emotionally catastrophic and lead to misery, distrust, betrayal, divorce…
The whole point of my coaching practice – and everything I do – is to provide you with reliable tools to recover quickly from little hurts, and create the relationship you truly desire – a conscious relationship that FEEDS YOUR LOVE instead of one that unconsciously challenges it at every turn.
The bottom line is that LITTLE hurts happen when we don’t know where our partner is coming from – when we subconsciously expect our partners to think, feel and behave like we would, but in practice, men and women are different.
Men and women speak differently, listen differently, and have vastly different needs and expectations relating to commitment, safety, sex – you name it – and until we become CURIOUS about why our partner did or said something THAT WAY instead of the way we expected, we’re going to get it wrong.
If you don’t want to get it wrong,
If you want to:
- immunize your current relationship against the erosion of little hurts…
- or find your life partner with the benefit of foresight…
- or even SAVE THE ROCKY BOAT YOU’RE ON…
I would love to see you in person August 11-12th, 2018 in Berkeley.
During my 2-Day Voraciously Curious for Couples and Singles Workshop, I laser focus on some of our differences so that men and women can heal past hurts and begin co-creating GREAT RELATIONSHIPS together.
It’s going to be a great weekend filled with insights you won’t want to miss!
I hope to see you soon.
PS. SPECIAL NOTE: VORACIOUSLY CURIOUS HAPPENS REGULARLY SO CLICK THE IMAGE BELOW TO CHECK FOR THE LATEST DATES IN CASE WE FORGOT TO UPDATE THIS POST!