Wherever you are, whatever you’re doing, wave a magic wand, stop time, and just take a minute to imagine your Perfect Lover and your Perfect Love!
Fantasize if you have too!
Right now.
Imagine your Perfect Lover and your Perfect Love and tell me:
What does it look like? How does your partner feel to you? What’s your favorite thing to share? What would you give to make this moment last forever?!
Meditate for a moment.
Take a deep breath and feel it.
Take another deep breath and feel it wash through your body and take your breath away…
Pretty luscious, huh? When you allow yourself to FEEL LOVE VIBRATE through your every cell and very being?
At the beginning of a relationship, this is what Love feels like.
Everything is fresh and fun. Each partner notices all of the good things. They’re looking hopefully into the future and feeling relationship BLISS.
They spend their attention and energy on what they hope will happen and overlook the little quirks and mismatches and become “invested” in their future together.
For my part? I would give anything to make this moment last forever…
But eventually this focus shifts and “reality” sets it.
Assumptions and unexpressed wants and needs accumulate, and the little challenges build up and become boulders.
Feelings get hurt, and hurts grow into glaring wounds until many couples find themselves in crisis.
What’s happening here is that the ATTENTION OF EACH PERSON IS TURNING AWAY FROM WHAT’S WORKING.
They begin knit-picking one another literally (in word).
Or figuratively (in behavior).
Maybe even both!
BUT IT DOES NOT HAVE TO BE THIS WAY, and here’s why:
We typically think of energy as how much gas we have in the tank.
This is true. But on a deeper level, energy is something that creates our reality.
WHAT WE FOCUS OUR ATTENTION ON ATTRACTS MORE OF THE SAME.
Instead of focusing on what’s missing in your relationship – on what’s not working – try focusing on what you like, appreciate and value about your partner.
MEDITATE ON WHAT YOU LIKE DAILY!
Tell your partner what you like, appreciate and value about them daily.
Your partner will respond!
From wherever you begin.
Starting today.
Seriously! 🙂
To Love!
Kimi Avary
Relationship Navigation Specialist
P.S. If you’re frustrated and struggling with the heartbreak of relationship problems, maybe you just need a fresh perspective to get back to the place of Hope and Love!